If you are like me, on a giddy sugar high, then these days you have got Sheryl Crow’s sickeningly sweet, upbeat “Soak up the Sun” in your head on a loop like a broken record. Birds are chirping, neglected, translucent calves are emerging from t… [more]

The weirdo who advocates brewski ice cream and cannibalism is about to preach to you about the evils of greed. This week we are going to kick it Old Testament, so pay attention and stop making fake fart noises in your metaphorical pew. Since I’d ra… [more]

What could possibly be hotter than the complete and utter political and economic collapse of the great United States of America you ask? Well, just about anything short of Elmo singing “Sexy Back.” But a bill, which would prepare the grand state … [more]

Do you hear that? It sounds like a cross between a mountain river riddled with whitecaps rushing out of the Rockies and the sound a tea kettle makes when the pot is ready. It’s really just your blood rushing through your veins at maximum velocity a… [more]

I know what you’re thinking. Hot ice cream? That’s impossible! A paradox of paramount proportions! Alliteration and excessive punctuation aside, before you start having a meltdown in the middle of Prexy’s Pasture or wherever you may be reading … [more]

Attention: This is not a plug. Yes, a certain writer at a certain newspaper may work for a certain recycling center at a certain university in Laramie. And certain co-workers and employers in this certain recycling center may have verbally supported … [more]

Have you ever vomited in a movie queue line? Me neither, but I came ominously, queasily close once. It was the end of the month, when, because of my complete incompetence in the saving of money, I was running low on financial dividends.  As I silent… [more]

Let’s talk about beards: big beards, bushy beards, dirty beards, clean beards, half beards, patchy beards and beards so healthy and face-encompassing that Elijah Wood could hide in them.  You can see it in nearly every face you pass on the street.… [more]